Ashram Life in the Age of Pandemic

April 5, 2020: Journal Entry

The sound of spring is how I feel inside.

My body and mind buzzing with happiness, with ideas and possibilities. The mandatory “Shelter in Place” has granted much-needed allotments of inspiring, blissfully, guilt-free lazy time into the lives of myself and many people around the world. The time to daydream, rest, plan, and create. This precious gift is hidden in financial loss, uncertainty, life changing stresses, and the misunderstanding between solitude and loneliness. This gift is hidden even among the dead, and the isolated. I must look closely for the courage among fear and peace among chaos. I must be still to listen to the voice of my own heart.

As we enter week three of a Shelter in Place quarantine due to a rapidly spreading mutated cold virus, I’m finally starting to utilize this mandatory “downtime” as a “rudder” of sorts. A rudder on my own personal Lifeboat. ( A lifeboat that was sputtering around in confusion as I tried to wrap my mind around what was going on in the world as the virus made it’s way west like an invisible tidal wave, a tidal wave with the very real potential of becoming a tsunami of uncontained death, fear, loneliness, and misinformation and politics.) My hope is that how I choose to utilize my time now will help dictate my direction for the next season post Covid.

Freedom for me is found in having the time to explore whatever I want, the opportunity to dismiss procrastination is here. It’s quite nice actually to spend part of the day simply watching pencil sketching tutorials, reading a book on courage and other notable human virtues, or taking naps because my body calls for a midday rest. As I get older, up until now I never fully appreciated the idea of a good nap.

Late morning yoga and the practice of a new pranayama technique. Having the space to stay up late to write because I can sleep in and still get my 6-8 hours and have the space to step onto my mat. Laughing with a new teacher, Blair Lewis, as I watch his tutorial and reacquaint myself with alternate nostril breathing (Nadi Shodhana=> Nadi or channel purification breathing practice) has been a lesson on joyful teaching of Covid 19 survival todos.

Diving into my notes and lessons from yoga programs past.

I hope that what I do with this time will help me with my own yoga teachings by bringing experience and more study into my practice. I hope that I’m drawing some good out of this experience. I hope that I do not waste this valuable time in the midst of urgency.

Late evening hikes along the edge of the forest for the occasional toke and writing down my stony thoughts, stepping into my yoga mat for breath aligned movement certainly help with the randomness of emotions that rise up like a rogue wave on a calm, dark sea.

Diving into what interests me and seeing what that will create seems like a productive thing for me to do right now. If anything it’s been good for my soul, strangely enough in the midst of what’s going on in the world, I feel just as happy as I did the mornings leading up to the New Year. Yes, real shit is happening and I’m navigating the ups and downs of it, some days better then others, but lately, I seem to be returning to this happiness deep within myself. It’s something that seems to be churning from within me and not outside of me.

Hmm, happiness from within, from the soul, of course, I must explore more while the world slows down and my time is my own.

It’s late now, time for bed, as I close my eyes, and drift off to the sound of spring, the crickets, frogs, and the occasional bird song. A joyful chorus under the light of the moon just outside my window🦋